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The Concept of 'Positive Parenting' is Sometimes Misunderstood
Author: Marsha Maung
Published: 30 March 2006
Positive parenting is the in-thing these days. If you’re not a positive parent, you’re not really living in this century. Still holding onto that cane, ready to whack your kids with it? You’re not a good mother – not a good parent AT ALL. Nuh-uh. Feel nothing when you raise your voice at your kids because they’ve smudged the sofa with chocolate ice-cream even when you told them not to? You’re terrible. You shouldn’t even be a mother!
OK, hold it right there. Positive parenting has been blown WWWWAAAYYY out of proportion and because of misinformation, many modern parents feel that they have to conform to a mould that society has suddenly decided is to be the norm. Not knowing what positive parenting actually is can do the parent and the child a world of damage. Yes, DAMAGE. Positive parenting is a kind of concept that needs in-depth study.
OK, it’s getting kind of scary around here.
Some people assume that the way to be a positive parent is by being lenient, kind, patient, gentle, subtle, and submissive. Ok, even if this is not the slightest bit the way we think, we could be doing it unknowingly. It’s true. Don’t just shake your head, look back and evaluate. Aren’t there times when you feel like reprimanding your child and then you think that you should be more POSITIVE, so, you try to get them to do what they should do, they get away and then you think…I have to be positive so, I’ll find the right time to do this? And you don’t. And they get away. And they learn that mom’s kind of weird. But good-weird.
Positive parenting is about instilling values, guiding, loving and disciplining our kids positively. Positive parenting is about disciplining them, punishing them kindly for the things that they have done wrong. Positive parenting is about showing them the right way to do things without crushing their self-confidence. Positive parenting is about showing our kids that we are boss, but we are good bosses.
Positive parenting is about loving them without spoiling them. Positive parenting is also about reprimanding them without nagging them. Positive parenting is about instilling good values in them without diminishing their own personalities. Positive parenting is about protecting them but letting them go when they are ready to.
The hardest part is….that we will have to let them go one day. And our job is to ensure that they are ready to do so. Because we’re positive parents, we may have the inclination of clinging on to them for dear life and we end up being as dependent on them as they are on us during the early stages of life.
The concept involves a parent and a child walking together towards a destination, knowing that there is a fork at the end of that road and treasuring every single step that they take together and accepting the fact that one day, they’ll end up in a different place.
Don’t misunderstand the concept of positive parenting. Positive parenting is not about spoiling or being dependent on a child. It’s about loving and teaching our kids positively and constructively.
About the author
Marsha Maung is a freelance graphic designer and copy writer who works from her home in Selangor, Malaysia. She loves nothing more than blowing bubbles in the park with her 2 kids, Joshua and Jared. She designs apparel and premium items at
http://www.allmomstuff.com and is the author of "Raising little magicians", and the popular "The Lance in freelancing".
More information can be found at http://www.marshamaung.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Marsha_Maung
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